Oh, summer. We meet yet again for a few joyous months of drenching humidity, scorching sun, bugs, grilled meat, and traffic, traffic, traffic. Ah, yes, all kinds traffic. Out- of- Towner traffic. ‘I don’t recognize that license plate’ traffic. ‘I can’t seem to travel on my own roads’ traffic. So lovely, so welcoming. So, this post is for you, you “from elsewhere visitors”, and also for those of you who plan to be elsewhere this summer. I will be the friendliest local, and I promise locals will be nice to you if you merely heed my advice.
Number One: Brake tapping is not a sport. I don’t know if it is where you come from, but here, it’s frowned upon. We like the accelerator here, especially if you’ve positioned yourself in the left lane… which brings me to my second point…
Number Two: The left lane is for people who like to drive, not ‘brake tap.’ Contraire to what the “signs” say, the left lane is not for “passing only,” it’s for those of us who like to drive. Fast. Now move.
Number Three: You don’t live here, so don’t act like you own the place! That means no harassing locals, no cursing at those of us who know where we are going, no being loud and obnoxious at the beach (okay, so that’s a lost cause, but it was a valiant effort on my part, no?)
Number Four: No need to bring your entire life to the beach. That includes, but is not limited to: coolers with wheels, multiple coolers with wheels, whole watermelons, foot long heroes, two radios, two umbrellas, your entire extended family and a full size tent. Please also don’t talk “business” on your cell phone while you are shirtless in a beach chair. This does not make you look powerful or important. No one cares about you, your money or your job. We care about relaxing on our beach. Now shut it.
Adapt to the environment you are in, not the other way around. That’s the whole point of travel—getting out of your comfort zone… not bringing it with you.
Seems simple, doesn’t it?